I Am French Fry

cannabunz:Being a decent human means holding your trash until you can locate a goddamn trashcan u...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 18:30:13 -0400

Being a decent human means holding your trash until you can locate a goddamn trashcan u littering swine

madhattey: humans-are-space-orcs: el-es35: No limit..✌ One...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 16:45:13 -0400

humans-are-space-orcs:

el-es35:

No limit..✌

One alien to another: “special affects? Photo shop?”

The other: “Must be”

A human: “nope”

…..

…..

O-O….

My god….

bigbitterbi: bigbitterbi: literallyaflame: literallyaflame: tf...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 15:00:31 -0400

bigbitterbi:

bigbitterbi:

literallyaflame:

literallyaflame:

tfw those seals won’t get off ur damn lawn

i would very much like this seal man to be the next big meme, but i feel like the “get off my lawn” joke is not powerful enough. please help. seal man deserves this

me trying to catch my last brain cell

okay here’s the visual

and also

Where is the lie

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 14:14:29 -0400

Where is the lie

thestereotypebuster: kldslnthedark: petition for Tom Holland to recreate this gif Bold of you to...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 14:13:15 -0400

thestereotypebuster:

kldslnthedark:

petition for Tom Holland to recreate this gif

Bold of you to assume that’s not already him

charlesoberonn: showerthoughtsofficial: slow wifi is somehow more frustrating than no wifi No wifi...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 13:15:13 -0400

charlesoberonn:

showerthoughtsofficial:

slow wifi is somehow more frustrating than no wifi

No wifi frees you to do something else.

Slow wifi is like Tantalus’ punishment. You’re so close, but you can’t quite reach for it. And you’re in too deep, so you can’t walk away either.

literallyaflame: maknaeseaguii: literallyaflame: literallyafl...

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 11:30:12 -0400

literallyaflame:

maknaeseaguii:

literallyaflame:

literallyaflame:

tfw those seals won’t get off ur damn lawn

i would very much like this seal man to be the next big meme, but i feel like the “get off my lawn” joke is not powerful enough. please help. seal man deserves this

Here’s my addition! Hopefully it hasn’t been done yet

thank u so much, it had not been done yet, you are a Pioneer

Photo

Tue, 26 Jun 2018 09:45:11 -0400

charlesoberonn: Me: Father, a question has been vexing my mind and tearing my family apart. Please,...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 21:10:49 -0400

charlesoberonn:

Me: Father, a question has been vexing my mind and tearing my family apart. Please, help us solve this conundrum.
Priest: Of course, my son.
Me: What Hogwarts house would Jesus belong to?
Priest: . . .
Priest: …Hufflepuff.

vic394: To all parents out there: when you’ll go watch Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom, PLEASE DO...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 21:02:28 -0400

vic394:

To all parents out there: when you’ll go watch Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom, PLEASE DO NOT BRING YOUR LITTLE KIDS ALONG

Okay, I need to say this. When I went to the theatre yesterday, a good half of the audience was composed by children. Most of them looked like they were somewhere between four and six years old, and they were all happy because they were going to watch dinosaurs on the big screen. But I want you to know that THIS IS NOT A MOVIE SUITED FOR LITTLE CHILDREN.

Especially during the second half, there was a particularly strong scene involving the little girl and one of the dinosaurs. It was nothing graphic (as were a lot of other scenes oh my god no baby deserves to see those things), but it had a lot of suspence and was honestly creepy. Now, I’m a grown up gal, I can go to sleep peacefully after watching something like this. But the kid two rows ahead of me, the poor baby who started sobbing uncontrollably and kept repeating that he was afraid? I don’t fucking think so, and it pisses me off.

I don’t want to walk into a room just to find children screaming in terror because their parents didn’t gather enough information on the movie they were about to watch, and that’s exactly what happened yesterday. NO KID DESERVES TO BE SCARED SHITLESS LIKE THE ONES I SAW YESTERDAY.

So please, parents, if you want to watch Fallen Kingdom because your little ones asked you to, please tell them no. If you want to watch Fallen Kingdom because you’re a fan, please hire a babysitter for two hours. And please, pass it on.

just-shower-responses: just-shower-thoughts:“Firefly” is the opposite of “Waterfall” you would not...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 20:50:16 -0400

just-shower-responses:

just-shower-thoughts:
“Firefly” is the opposite of “Waterfall”

you would not believe your walls
if ten million waterfalls
filled up your house and fucking drowned you

prismatic-bell: purgatoryandme: ceasarslegion: Reporter in the Marvel unviverse: Anthony Stark,...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 20:30:50 -0400

prismatic-bell:

purgatoryandme:

ceasarslegion:

Reporter in the Marvel unviverse: Anthony Stark, well-known as a generous philanthropist, the CEO of Stark Industries, and his alter-ego “Iron Man,” under fire today after a controversial video he posted to his personal Vine account went viral. The short footage showed Stark in the passenger seat of a car, driving by an anti-homosexual rally, repeatedly shouting “I love sucking [expletive for male genitalia]” out of the open window.

A+ Concept, I love it, I’m dying, it’s too good.

It becomes the hottest new meme throughout the US. Every single time there’s some homophobic rally, Hell, every time there’s a rally held by homophobes whether or not the rally was ABOUT homophobia there’s now teens doing drive-by’s being like “Ahem, this one is for Tony Stark - I LOVE SUCKING [expletive for male genitalia]”. The meme keeps escalating as people find newer and funnier ways to bleep out what they are saying in real time and on Vine. The most popular way? The sound of a repulser charging up.

The whole thing drives homophobes crazy. They hate it so much, it literally has some people trying to create their own counter meme (”I love sucking UP TO JESUS”) that goes very very badly (exactly how you’d expect). So, out of options, they try to sue Tony.

Everybody should know better than to sue Tony.

His lawyers tear them apart. There’s an unholy grin on Tony’s face during the entire publicized case - he’s in a rainbow suit. He’s in rainbow shades. He’s wearing a harness over his suit and his shoes literally leave glitter footprints everywhere he goes. His tie says “I love sucking [REPULSER NOISE]”. Twitter goes nuts. A still of Tony from the trial, one where he is sarcastically blowing pink glitter into the face of a woman trying to hit him with a picket sign, becomes a reaction image nobody can resist. You wanna represent how tired you are of homophobic comments? That’s your image. It’s usually coupled by one of Rhodey in the background, military dress uniform smeared in glitter and a blatant glittery kiss mark pressed to his cheek, staring at the ceiling and praying for death.

I love Tumblr Tony Stark so much more than canon Tony Stark, in no small part because he lets me ignore the MCU exists.

rainagainstmywindow: gaymilesedgeworth: geekandmisandry: missab...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 20:23:29 -0400

rainagainstmywindow:

gaymilesedgeworth:

geekandmisandry:

missabnormal:

waluwadjet:

stephanemiroux:

sprmint-bkgsoda:

Just like I said. Illegal adoption.

https://abcnews.go.com/Blotter/immigrant-mom-loses-effort-regain-son-us-parents/story?id=16803067

Here are the thieves btw:

im actually physically ill

They changed his name. They fucking changed his name.

State sponsored child trafficking. How neat.

this context is so fucking sketchy and it’s not appearing in any of the articles i’m reading about this situation. (source)

Hi remember when the Nazis stole children and renamed them and put them in Nazi families? Please tell me the whole world shouldn’t be worried about this. This makes me sick to my stomach. This child’s mother is in federal prison her crime being she was seeking asylum and her child was stolen from her and now she’s been erased from his life!

introvertunites: If you’re an introvert, follow us...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 20:15:25 -0400

introvertunites:

If you’re an introvert, follow us @introvertunites

apopse-leipeis: Satan: hey I bought your soul last month and- Me: no returns. Satan: please it’s...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 18:30:21 -0400

apopse-leipeis:

Satan: hey I bought your soul last month and-
Me: no returns.
Satan: please it’s making me sad.

rosswoodpark: j9: surfmanstevens420: j9: I’m glad Jack Links...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 16:45:20 -0400

rosswoodpark:

j9:

surfmanstevens420:

j9:

I’m glad Jack Links recognizes non-binary genders

the signs arent even right

holy fuck

I can’t believe beef jerky single handedly destroyed gender

taco-bell-rey: chewing minty gum, then breathing in cold winter air Remember when Arthur or...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 15:54:33 -0400

taco-bell-rey:

chewing minty gum, then breathing in cold winter air

Remember when Arthur or whatever the fuck his name was just straight up fuckin DIED

preach:

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 15:00:35 -0400

preach:

wordsanddiscords: counterpurrs: whatwouldthordo: tatted-soldie...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 13:15:19 -0400

wordsanddiscords:

counterpurrs:

whatwouldthordo:

tatted-soldier:

BMO stares death in the face

I CAN NEVER GET OVER HOW FUCKING METAL THIS IS

IF YOU COULD TATTOO GIFS, I WOULD TATTOO THIS ENTIRELY ON MY BACK

HOW is this even remotely metal????

one sec guys, i need to rip my vital organs out of my back and die for a second. cross your fingers i just happen to land on my replacement organs and keep on living

BMO is metal af

sunalwaysshining: My fav thing is looking really hot in front of people who once made me feel like...

Mon, 25 Jun 2018 11:30:18 -0400

sunalwaysshining:

My fav thing is looking really hot in front of people who once made me feel like shit about my appearance